Today is your birthday. Your friends planned a surprise party for you. God surprised us all by taking you away from us Saturday morning. It is so hard for me to write my thoughts into words. You’ve given me your strength to deal with this, but this is where I break down. You left us so suddenly. I don’t know why God decided to take you right now when none of us were ready. Everybody who has ever known you has loved, respected and looked at you as a role model. You were the kindest, realest, most sincere, big hearted, warm, responsible, not to forget the absolute most intelligent human being I was lucky to call Dad.
I shared a fond memory with your dear friend who came to visit us and see how mom was doing yesterday of your first time coming to America. You told us you wore a brown sweater and described it. Then you thought for a moment and said you think you still had it. You went down to the basement and 20 minutes later you joyfully ran upstairs telling us you found it! Lol! Then you tried it on and it fit, so you wore it the rest of the eve.
You had the sharpest memory and would remember the smallest things about people – especially dates. Birthdays, the dates people moved here & there. You were the story teller and told such animated stories, you told us your fond memories of India and your favorite topic was partition lol.
I remember once in my early 20’s I came to you about a situation and you told me I can always come to you without hesitation and that I can speak to you as a friend. You always encouraged me and gave me the best advice, whether I would take it or not. Your advice was always right, whether I would take it or not lol. At the end of the day, no matter what stupid thing I would do, you would always tell me no matter what, you would always be on my side and support my decisions and that I have your approval as long as it made me happy. You told me that all the time. As long as it made me happy than you will be on my side 101%.
You gave mom and our family the greatest life! We had everything. We had a great circle of friends, lots of laughs, lots of great memories! You put the family first and you were extra responsible. We had absolutely no worries. You were also the smartest man ever and the one everyone used to go to for advice on anything from buying a home, career advice to marriage related advice.
I learned how to be strong and independent from you. I have my moments when I feel sad, but I smile thinking of you as I know you want me to be happy and you want me to be strong. Especially for mom. Mom is weak. This is the most devastating thing to have happened to her. Please give me your strength dad to help her get through this. I know I will, because you taught me as that was your duty towards me. Your duty towards her was to take care of her and never let her lift a finger. She never had to, now she’s scared and doesn’t understand that she still doesn’t need to because she has all of us.
Today is your birthday. Tomorrow is your cremation. I’m not ready for that. You are still with me and always will be. I will never refer to you in past tense. I love you forever.
I leave you with this song that was a favorite of yours. This melody has been playing softly in my head since Saturday when I received the worst news of my life. I remember sitting there watching some video of Punjabi wedding songs and trying to forward to a good song when you came into the room and sat on the floor with your newspaper (you always read the newspaper lol) and I was about to forward this song because it was repetitive but you told me to replay it. Again and again as you kept saying how nice a song this is lol. Now you are sitting there while the angels sing to you.